Thursday, October 28, 2010

Be a Belle, not an Ariel.

I just took a quiz on Facebook entitled, "What Disney Princess are You?"

Anyone that knows me could tell you I'm Belle. Let us reference her character description, as found on Wikipedia, to support my claim:
"A bookish young woman who falls in love with the Beast and finds the kind-hearted human inside him. In their effort to enhance the character from the original story, the filmmakers felt that Belle should be 'unaware' of her own beauty and made her 'a little eccentric'."

Well, I think you can see that we're practically the same person. I'm bookish, I read all the time. I haven't exactly fallen in love with a Beast yet, but I'm not out-ruling the possibility. I am COMPLETELY unaware of my own beauty. And I'm eccentric. Ask anyone in my choir.

So you see, that any quiz designed by someone with an ounce of intelligence would have realized that I'm Belle. Or maybe Meg from Hercules. I would settle for Meg, even though she's technically not a princess.

But this quiz had the audacity to tell me that I am like.... Ariel. I cannot stand Ariel. Let us reference her character description:
As depicted in the 1989 film, Ariel is the youngest of King Triton's seven daughters. She is shown as being adventurous and curious about the world of humans, a fascination which angers her father as merfolk are forbidden from making contact with the human world. [. . .] Ariel salvages human items and keeps them in a secret grotto as part of her collection. Unfortunately for her, most of her knowledge of humans is through her collection, and her information regarding these names and functions of the items she has is almost wholly inaccurate thanks to her well meaning but thoroughly misinformed friend Scuttle, a seagull she visits on the surface from time to time when she finds new human "artifacts." Her confusion regarding human objects works to win her the friendship and favor of the humans she later comes in contact with during the film, as they find her antics amusing."

First things first, I am the oldest of three children, not the youngest of seven. And, although I guess I do have an adventurous and curious spirit somewhere in me, I am in no way an ungrateful little brat like Ariel is. This girl can't just understand that her father gives her everything she needs, and that going to the shore is an unnecessary danger. She should be content where she is. And I would never use a lack of intelligence as a flirting device, I want to be admired for my brains, not the fact that I showed up on a beach naked and couldn't figure out how to use a fork.

So CLEARLY, I am nothing like this princess. All she wants to do is go and be with the humans, because her own family isn't good enough for her-

Oh no. We have something in common. She's not happy at home. And I can't wait to go to college.

But that's completely different. College is going to be an educational, parent-sanctioned adventure. Ariel becoming a human involved her going to see Ursula the sea-witch, who then preceded to take away her voice, the only thing that makes her unique and sets her aside from the other mermaids, just so she can impress some guy. She is a horrible role model for young girls everywhere.

So be a Belle. Not an Ariel.

Happy birthday to Bill Gates, Julia Roberts, Brad Paisley, Joaquin Phoenix, and my friends Michael, Nitzan, and Skye. I hope you've all enjoyed your day.

Once I took a quiz about my "flirting style" and it told me I was a slut and that no one should be my friend. Can't quizzes get anything right these days?

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